Category Archives: AAA Caregiving

Why does my child follow me to the bathroom?

Those who take care of children who are recovering from a tough start to life commonly report that the child in their care follows them to the bathroom, and becomes unreasonably distressed when prevented from doing so. In my experience … Continue reading

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What I would have birth parents hear after the removal of their child

Twenty seven years speaking to children and young people (and care experienced adults) who have been removed from the care of their birth parents due to grossly inadequate care and maltreatment has left me with deep concerns about the impact of parental separation and loss on the developing child, and the capacity for alternate care and therapeutic supports alone to compensate for this. (read more at link) Continue reading

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What does my child’s recovery from early trauma look like?

Anyone who has played Spotto (Spot the yellow car) with children knows that there are many more yellow cars on the road than you typically notice when driving. Similarly, when playing I Spy there are many more things starting with … Continue reading

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Why does my child lie?

Lying is not necessarily evidence of a character flaw or lack of connection with reality. Children and young people who are recovering from a tough start to life due to abuse and neglect lie for self-protection. Such is their profound … Continue reading

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Why does my child smile when I am angry?

Smiling when you are angry is not necessarily a sign that the child or young person in your care is feeling self-satisfied and smug. Many children and young people who are recovering from a tough start to life due to abuse and neglect are unsettled by heightened emotion in adults. For them, it is associated with something bad happening. Continue reading

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Why do my kids destroy their belongings?

Destruction of their clothes, toys and other belongings is not necessarily a sign of ingratitude or disrespect. Many children who are recovering from a tough start to life due to abuse and neglect are mistrustful of receiving nice things and … Continue reading

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Why is my child’s room always messy?

Messy bedrooms are not necessarily evidence of a chaotic mind or wilful disobedience. For children who are recovering from a tough start to life due to abuse and neglect or other forms of hardship, it can be a sign that … Continue reading

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Supporting Strong Developmental Outcomes: The case for CARE and Attachment Security

Raising children who have the best chance of achieving their potential involves connection with our task. It involves parenting with intention; thinking about what we are doing, and why. It involves holding the child in our mind; especially their experiences … Continue reading

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More than a spare room: What kids really need from foster carers

I have been thinking about what children and young people who cannot be safely cared for at home need from their foster carers. I want readers to adopt a broad definition of foster for the purposes of this post, including … Continue reading

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A Short Introduction to Attachment and Resilience

I have maintained this blog site or more than ten years. This will be the 250th post published to it. Given the sheer volume of content I have decided to make a post with links to the posts that I … Continue reading

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