A little extra understanding in tough times

In this, the fourth in a series of posts about resources I am distributing to help caregivers of children during these extraordinary times, I highlight the importance for children and young people of being heard and understood. Science shows that feeling heard and understood by a trusted adult is like a psychological vaccine against mental health problems and behaviour problems. Feeling heard and understood supports wellbeing and a confident approach to life and relationships. Feeling heard and understood reassures a child or young person that they can depend on adults in a caregiving role. Feeling heard and understood supports ideas that their experiences are real, that their experience matters, and that they matter.

In tough times, we cannot always make the problem go away, but engaging with understanding offers a powerful experience of connection that supports wellbeing and resilience.

In the first of two related infographics below, I outline a process for enriching a child or young person’s experience of being heard and understood. In the second resource, I describe a variation of the Pick-up-Sticks Game that can be utilised to support experiences of being heard and understood. If you wish to download a PDF of these resources, click here.

The CARE Model is explained in more detail in A Short Introduction to Attachment and Attachment Disorder (Second Edition). To purchase the book, and support this site, please consider doing so from one of the sites below by clicking on the caption:

A straightforward guide to keeping things on track in the home during tough times. Includes printable worksheets – see preview below. 18pp

Pay/donate what you want:


Or, download here.


About colbypearce

I am a practising Clinical Psychologist with twenty-seven years’ experience working with children and young people recovering from abuse and neglect. I am also an author and educator in trauma-informed, therapeutic caregiving. My programs are implemented in Australia and Ireland, and I am well-known for my practical and accessible guidance for caregivers and professionals alike.
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